this post was submitted on 26 Jun 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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I (23M) was sitting on a bench drawing and a girl sat on the same bench, then she started talking about my drawings, I said a few words about them, but I started to feel that I was getting very nervous, and after some phrases i just stood up and walked away to another part of the park. A few minutes later I saw her heading my way again. But when she saw me her face became sad and she turned around and walked back the other way. Now i feel so awful about all this ,I didn't mean for this to happen but it kinda did. I want to ask people any advice of how to overcome this fears so this is not happened again. For the context i didnt have any genuine converstation with girls in 8-9 years, and i didnt have this problem with males

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago (1 children)

As an aside - what you did is fine. Will she/others interpret it in various ways? Sure.

But leaving a situation that you might not have been comfortable with isn’t wrong.

[–] timmytbt 18 points 1 day ago

And while I’m not disagreeing with this, it is also ok to check in with yourself and notice “ok, I have uncomfortable feelings” but then ask the question “Am I in danger?”. We all get uncomfortable some times but we’d never do anything new if we always stop ourselves just because we’re uncomfortable. The trick is learning the difference between good/safe uncomfortable and bad/dangerous uncomfortable, and to learn that you need to practice being with your feelings. Read up about exposure therapy.