this post was submitted on 05 Jun 2025
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AskMenOver30
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If you are very lucky you will see many people you love very much, die. If you're not lucky, you will die first. It will usually be a surprise. Tomorrow is never guaranteed.
Say "I love you" often, express your gratitude often, be in the moment often, with anyone you care about, and with yourself.
Amen. Your answer is one of the few that is actually brutal advice that everyone should be given.
Something I've wanted to know, but have been too afraid to ask older friends, is does it get easier? Especially as the number of people dying keeps increasing and happening more and more frequently.
Im 50 and no it does not. Losing my mom’s 68 year old BFF in December hurt just as much as my grandmother dying 37 years ago.
To add: knowing in advance that a death is imminent vs a sudden death is not easier. If you can, add people to your life. Loneliness makes loss even worse.
I think that depends on the death. My other grandmother who died a decade or so had significant dementia and hadn't recognized me in two years despite weekly visits. By the time she died I had already mourned her loss.