this post was submitted on 24 Feb 2025
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ADHD
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I got a (old) sailing boat a few years back. At least I wasn't completely alone in that business, but the others weren't exactly the most responsible people either. We sold the boat after a year, and I feel that I dodged a bullet by a narrow margin. I have only some experience sailing and couldn't go by myself, also winter storage and things related to that are quite the hassle and it seemed that it would end up being my responsibility to sort those, among other things, out in the future.
Now I've got a motorbike and like with that boat I was at first very interested in learning stuff related to it, maintenance and everything, but it seems that I always need someone else to inspire me to keep going. Now I have to rely on my partner to take initiative. I'm totally happy fixing it and enjoy riding a lot, but can't f*cking do it alone and that annoys me so much. I feel like a failure for not being able to "follow my dreams" without someone holding my hand. I'd like to get a van to build it into a small place for myself, but I know I couldn't go anywhere by myself.
Now that I've realised this novelty-seeking tendency I try to not get too excited about new things (or at least make any investments) before I'm sure the inspiration will last. But then again I need something to be excited about to keep going. But to keep excitement going I need someone to share it with.
Maybe we need to collectively buy an island and establish a neurospice nation where we could arrange work and stuff so that there's enough rotation to keep things interesting and allow people to hyperfocus on those things that they enjoy but let them swap when needed XD
I mean, there's a whole host of reasons we should get an island, and make our own country while we're at it, so I'm totally on board.
I completely understand what you mean!
Personally, I believe that having an enthusiastic project partner or someone to share hobbies and routines with would greatly motivate me to pursue my interests more actively. While I do have a partner, she is quite content with her current lifestyle and doesn't share the same enthusiasm for exploring new activities. She enjoys her role as a parent to our child, which I also cherish, but I often find myself wanting to engage in various activities that she isn't as interested in.
One strength of having a partner like her is that she keeps me grounded and helps me stay balanced, reminding me of how people with more normative lifestyles approach things, which can be different from my more eccentric and active tendencies.
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I am all in on making that Island dream come through lol!