this post was submitted on 08 Jan 2025
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Mental Health

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Idk if it's because of my ADHD or Depression but I struggled my whole life with finding a healthy balance to all these temptations that this world offers.

I'm 21 years old now (and a male) and I feel like this is now stronger than ever. It could be worse because these temptations might've become more and stronger or it's the fact that becoming an adult feels so overwhelming to me because of all the freedoms that come with all these responsibilities of managing and balancing/limiting everything yourself.

I find it so hard to restrict/discipline myself since there are so many temptations in this consumer oriented world. Even though I know that most of the stuff isn't good for me, it feels impossible to have the discipline to not go after it/escape it.

And often I have this inner conflict of not knowing what the right decision is and if I should do what my inner child desperately wants because it feels like it will easily give me the happiness that I'm seeking for my life and that I can't miss out on it (but it might as well be an illusion and will only make my life worse) or if I should not go after that to potentially become long-term successful/happy but with the big possibility of failing anyways (which is why I don't go after the second option most of the time since it seems like an unachievable illusion to me since I always fail anyways). It's like a part in me wants it but the other part doesn't want it/knows that it is bad for me. But it seems impossible to figure out the truth.

Idk if this has something to do with capitalism and wonder if it might be different in non capitalistic societies or if they have the same problem. Because it seems like everything in this world is designed to get people to buy/consume it. I feel like the world just sees me as a dollar sign and wants to milk every penny out of me without caring what this does to my health. Like a trap.

I know we're supposed to be responsible for our own actions but it seems that it is made so hard to the point where its almost impossible to do. I mean it is well known through insiders, whistleblowers but also the industry itself that these big companies hire psychiatrists and neurologists to make all these products such as social media as addictive as possible since engagement and attention span is key for them. And they are well aware about the downsides and affects to peoples health but they don't care cause they only care about the money. It's like they intentionally make us sick for their greedy benefits.

It's like there are all these doors for entering escapism, they're all around me and are screaming that I need to go in. And since I already feel so miserable it seems impossible to not enter the doors cause they're the easiest way of escaping the misery and somehow getting through the day.

It's so hard to get out and live a life outside off these temptations cause they're everywhere and give you this easy and fast pleasure that's craved by our simple primate brains.

There's constantly new stuff like addictive food, toxic media and technologies, new consoles, games and so on.

It seems to me that the world is designed to put us down instead of lifting us up. And it feels impossible to escape it since I'm too weak to overcome all these external things that are designed against me.

But the biggest driver seems to be the fear of missing out and not doing the right thing that will not make me happy.

Am I the only one who feels like this? What are your thoughts on this? How much could this be a personal issue and how much could it be societal related?

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[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

As others have said, it is normal for your age. My personal tip is to try to wait at least 24 hours before buying something or sending that email. If it still seems like a good idea it has at least matured over a nights sleep and some thought.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

As others have said, it is normal for your age.

I want to second this. An important part of your 20s is learning how to interact with the world as an adult. That means access to many more things, but also the requirement to develop personal skills to responsibly use what is now available to you.

My personal tip is to try to wait at least 24 hours before buying something or sending that email. If it still seems like a good idea it has at least matured over a nights sleep and some thought.

In my 20s, when I was overspending, I did something similar to this. Anytime I saw something I wanted to buy (not required for life), I would write it on a list. I allowed myself a purchase of 1 item off the list a week, but the rule is that the item I purchased must have been on the list for at least one week.

I was surprised how many things on the list I found I didn't want anymore even after a few days, and since they were just on the list, instead of being purchased, I ended up saving quite a bit of money. I also didn't feel denied things, because I was still allowing myself to buy one thing off the list.