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Considerations for pursuing long-term relationships with guys? (programming.dev)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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At 31, I have had 6-10 sexual partners (depending on what counts), half guys, half girls. My female partners (including one transfem) were mostly interested in long-term relationships, as am I. My male partners were all hookups with no follow-up, much to my disappointment. As I am now actively looking for a boyfriend, are there any special considerations when courting men, as opposed to women, for this purpose?

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A decade ago this was less true, but dating apps on smartphones seem to be, as you say, for hookups. I just find it appealing to have a menu, which seems like an efficient way to select partners.

May I ask, how did you meet your husband?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I met my husband in real life. We knew each other like 5 year before but fell out of touch, and a mutual friends had said something along the line lines of "You're gay now? That's weird, because I think that ______ said they're bi now?"
Their phrasing could have been better, but it worked out in the end.

I have dated guys off of sites that were used mostly for hook-ups. I put that I was open to dating on my profile, having non-sexual pictures as well as nudes. If someone opened with "nice cock" you know what they're after, but I was always sure that it was clear about what the situation was before we met up.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Interesting. I've never had sex with a friend, but maybe one day. Thanks for sharing.