Hii,
I am a freshly cracked mtf egg.
TLDR at end
My parents are raging transphobes. Like the level of crazy where both are anti vax, one is flat earther, and I've had arguments with them where they claim that there are a lot of people out there who identify as a helicopter and people who identify as something they weren't born as should be in mental asylums.
My youngest sibling won't be an adult until 15 months from now and still lives in their house. I don't know what my parents will do once I'm out, but I doubt it will be supportive and I'm sure it would ruin my sibling's life. They're immigrants who hold citizenship in another country, so leaving the US ("which infected me with the woke mind virus") with my youngest sibling is quite possible. Which is why I want to pass in boymode until they graduate high school (may 2026) and can get out.
My question is, when do I start HRT and at what dose? Do I start low dose at x months before I want to be out? Do I start regular dose y months before I want to be out? I plan to move to a blue State in a few months, so I would be living in a different State for the last few months before my youngest sibling gets out. So I can make excuses and not go home and just need to pass over video call after about feb 2026.
omg, that was so so long. Feel like I had to get some of that off my chest. Thanks for reading!!!
Additional info to consider:
- My weight is about 25% of the way from the lowest normal BMI to the highest normal BMI.
- My natural voice is already androngenous and I've been called m'am on the phone many times, so any vocal changes will likely fly under the radar.
- My hair is receding, idk if starting a low dose earlier instead of an avg dose later would help me keep more of it?
- I would be 23 for most of 2025. I heard the body can keep developing until 25, so does that mean I need to start earlier to make more of that last stage of development go in a fem way instead of a masc way? Or does it not really make a difference?
TLDR: trying to pass in person for ~12 more months and pass over video call for ~18. Heard something (maybe myth?) that it would be better to start earlier since I'm still in my low 20s. When do I start and low dose or normal dose?
Start as soon as you possibly can to start neutralizing the effects of testosterone as soon as possible and to have your bones grow in a feminine manner before they fuse such as your hips.
There is some debate on starting with lower dosages or not and how that can affect transition. Every body is different. You will need to take a form of estrogen, this typically comes in tablets, patches, injections and gels.
You will also need something to block your body from producing or absorbing testosterone. There are a few types of drugs you can take for this. The most prescribed one in the US is spirinolactone. Some boards recommend waiting to start spiro and starting at a lower dose as there has been reports of it causing breast buds to fuse too early.
A medicine that you can start right away without having to wait and you can get from any doctor is finasteride. It can help restore your hairline and stunt any masculinizing effects you receive from DHT, a byproduct of testosterone. Once your testosterone is fully suppressed you can stop taking it as there won't be any testosterone to convert into DHT.
Here is some light reading to help understand the process.
https://diyhrt.wiki/transfem
https://diyhrt.market/transfem-hrt-guide
https://transfemscience.org/
https://transcare.ucsf.edu/guidelines/feminizing-hormone-therapy