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Advice request: How do I stop venting to people? (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

16 comments fedilink hide all child comments

When I'm frustrated or anxious or upset, I vent to the few friends I have. This is a negative coping mechanism as it damages our relationships. I also experience extreme remorse after doing so, which further perpetuates it because I'm constantly asking to be forgiven.

Earlier this year I tried to see a therapist and ask for advice on this. She dismissed me and said that it's ok to do that and you can't simply keep everything inside.

She was incorrect and was also a shitty therapist for various reasons (she was 15-30 minutes late to each session and just dismissed anything I said).

I'm hopefully trying again with a new therapist soon, but I need advice in the meantime. It is actively damaging my relationships.

"Journaling" is not an option because I can't stop what I'm doing at work to go journal something whenever the need arises.

Thanks all. I can delete on request if needed.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

I really don't have much of an answer as I do this too, but I eventually forced myself to stop texting friends to vent and I kinda just vent to no one at all. I'm generally really really hard on myself, like I pretty much loathe who I am, so maybe it's kinda "easy" for me to not text them anymore because I pretty much just started saying to myself "who the fuck cares what you have to say, you're just bothering people." to get myself to stop before I text.

Now I just "bitch" out loud to myself, not yelling or anything really if anything it's muttering, but it does help to just let it out and move on.

I don't know if you're in a situation where that would make you look crazy or not lol I work in a factory with a bunch of angry people so it's not all that uncommon to hear someone complaining to no one.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 weeks ago

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