this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2024
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As for cards - I've now developed the habit of writing a text once a year and using it basically for everybody (slightly modified if necessary). Bonus points for a kid and a grown up version. Btw I also have the same standard text for weddings and funerals (these stay the same over the years). Most of my friends don't know each other and will never find out.
I also started to just wish very mundane things because it sounds poetic and I have wished them the same Big Things for years. No one ever congratulated me when I wished them happiness and health, but when I wish them the most colorful flowers on the roadside and warm summer rain on sun exhausted skin, and the occasional mindfulness to take the time to stop and appreciate these small moments everyone loses their shit. Sometimes something negative is also appreciated. Think you still got so many years ahead of you. Your path will in some parts be straightforward, but will make you stumble and fall in other parts. For the latter I wish you a helping hand to get up again and some colorful band aids
As a side note, I am more proud of my sincere go to when someone dies. Especially old people. Because I always point out that they don't need to excuse the death or downplay it because someone was old or it was predictable. Losing a person who you cared about, no matter how old or sick, is always painful and a big loss. And no matter how predictable it was, their death and your grief always end up taking you by surprise. And I wish everyone who lost someone the support necessary to have some time granted for their grief and pain. .
I actually have some same text for funerals as well. Although had to change it because unfortunately a friend of mine was hit with a second bereavement
Oof that would have hit me too. But I guess the older the become the more common it will be. At some point we'll go to more funerals than birthday parties. My whole card system will need to be reworked then.
Good point