this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
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MAGAs don't believe in doctors or medicine. That's just Jim, he's "politically neutral" and got suspended from med school after "prescribing" meth to his brother for ADHD, and selling it to him, and synthesizing it. Jim's alright, and you don't need no doctor, we can just go ask Jim what's going on.
We all laugh but I had a coworker once who was basically this entire comment but living and breathing. Let's call him Colton.
My asshole boss hired Colton when I was on vacation to be my "assistant" and I spent more time trying to fix his damage than get anything done. He had a neck tattoo and couldn't wear clothes that fit, he was constantly sweating and going to the bathroom to do whatever cocktail of drugs kept him vertical. Colton said once "I got a doctor that lives next door, he hooks me up with medicine."
One time Colton got involved in a robbery with one of our other employees, Colton wasn't charged but the homeowner knew Colton was involved and came to the showroom where I worked with a gun. Police were called, it was a whole thing.
When the '09 recession hit, most of the workforce was laid off, myself included. My boss kept Colton on though because he liked having someone he could bully easily and he looooved treating Colton like a punching bag.