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I wish I had a better guide on that myself! I've been using this guide for the time being, it covers the basics of how to set up a firewall: https://www.raspberrypi.com/documentation/computers/configuration.html#securing-your-raspberry-pi
actually, could you tell me more? not only are those new solutions to me, those are new problems. I don't even know how to tell if uPnP is turned on.
edit: oh! I have actually dealt with NAT reflection before, the guide I used called it Hairpin NAT. https://help.mikrotik.com/docs/display/ROS/NAT#NAT-HairpinNAT
You'd need to log into your router to see if it's enabled. Assuming you've got standard consumer grade stuff, it's likely on by default because it makes things like console multiplayer 'just work's without needing someone to go in and port forward stuff.
Before I built my home network, any Linksys/Netgear/etc router I used had that disabled when I was doing my initial setup.
updated post here, includes section on networking! let me know if this looks good? https://lemmy.world/post/2444639