Be me: Rikter, Tech
Be not me: DM; Armataige, Netrunner; Leprechaun, Medic
We've a little downtime after our last successful job...
Armataige & Rikter check themselves into the hospital for some therapy... it's been a sanity-draining campaign.
Leprechaun decides being a giant wearing a sequin leprechaun suit isn't quite sanity-damaging enough so he cobbles together a clown suit.
Armataige unsettles her therapist enough they need therapy now too... she has to spend a second week working on her head.
With the remainder of Rikter's downtime he grabs some extra Cyberware... what's Humanity good for if you don't spend it?
We're contacted by our Fixer who has a selection of jobs:
Destroy a Corporate Van... it's in a moderate security area.
Cause a disturbance near a corporate, but not Beaverville, mansion We're the distraction!
Both would pay very well.
Leprechaun suggests we steal the van & blow it up in front of the mansion to cause the disturbance.
Sounds like a plan! But random explosion... in Night City? That's mildly distracting but nothing too much.
You know what is distracting? 6th Street & the Tiger Claws getting into a gunfight in front of your house.
We decide to lean in on Leprechaun's new disguise and call the Bozos to see if they want in on making Corporate, Tiger Claws, & 6th Street the butt of the joke.
Armataige places the call and it goes well, the Bozos like making jokes out of people who're just too serious.
Rikter calls the two gangs to invite them to the auction... and it goes well. Now to steal the van.
The van's in a parking lot... fenced in with cameras on it.
Leprechaun's up approaching the guard station... sneaking up and for the first time in his life the giant rolls low on Stealth.
But these are small-time guards, not too observant on the night-shift.
However the door into the station is locked... he knocks. The guard activates stronger security for the door.
He peeks over to the window to see the guard aggressively loading his shotgun.
Leprechaun punches the glass... it's bulletproof but not super-fist proof.
While Leprechaun is being the distraction on this job to be a distraction we hop the fence.
The guard finishes loading his shotty and is pressing buttons on a control panel... probably the alarm.
Over the fence Rikter makes a mad-dash for the van... we're on borrowed time with the alarm raised.
Leprechaun's turn and a solid punch starts to buckle the bulletproof window inward... a second punches through! Leprechaun takes cover against the guard for the last of his turn.
Armataige still can't find a network node but looking 'bout she sees wires coming off the guard post... she tries pulling them... no dice. Time to get shootin'!
Nobody has eyes on the guard...
Rikter's turn and he reaches the van... tries to shoot out the window. It's bulletproof.
Leprechaun grabs his own shotty... and steps into a held action to shoot him. Crit-hit! For Leps own action he blasts the console the guard was tapping away at.
Armataige runs to Rikter's aid to help punch through the glass...
The guard exits his guardhouse and takes another shot at Leprechaun... this guy's scary good. Lep can normally dodge a shotgun blast.
Rikter manages to shatter the bulletproof window into the van.
Leprechaun slams his massive fist into the guard as the fool got just a little too close.
Armitaiges turn! She tries to get in the van... and it zaps her!
Two security patrol cars pull up and a pair of guards get out... thing's ain't looking good for Leprechaun. The guard already here backpedels then opens fire! The two new guards open fire with ARs
... Leprechaun is at least continuing to know how to dodge bullets.
Rikter vaults through the broken-open window into the van... and continues to get jolted as he tries to unlock the van.
Leprechaun rushes the first guard to grapple... and the guard dodges!
Armataige tries to break this shock-lock so we can get going...
Leprechaun spontaneously becomes Neo and bends backward dodging all the bullets for a round.
Rikter also fails to find the shock-lock...
Leprechaun successfully grabs the guy this time.
Armataige manages to find the lock and smash it.
The grappled guard breaks free from Leprechaun's grasp right as his friends open up with their rifles! He manages to dodge.
Rikter starts the van! but that's his whole turn
Leprechauns turn... he's still in a shooting gallery. He pops a SpeedHeal
Armataige gets in the car and opens the back doors as Rikter speeds off toward the gate and Leprechaun
Leprechaun takes a running leap into the van.
Armataige slams the doors after Leprechaun giving us a get-away vehicle.
The guards scramble for their cars as they see us begin to make our getaway.
Rikter pulls a 180 to get the Van facing the right way for his getaway driving.
Leprechaun pulls the bomb out of his pack and begins securing it into the van.
Armataige rolls down her window and readies to take shots at cops.
The cops start their engines... the first one pulls up to block out exit. *That's unfortunate... for them! They don't know how crazy Rikter is.
One ram later and the van is free and it's a high-speed chase!
Leprechaun's turn! We need you to defend the car! & he does opening the back door and leveling his shotgun at them.
One incendiary shotgun blast later and a cruiser is on fire.
Armataige tries to shoot out a tire... and misses.
Rikter leans out the broken window to take a shot with his other hand on the wheel... and still can't hit a tire.
Leprechaun also misses trying to blast out a tire.
Armataige still can't hit a tire... we could really use a Solo
Autofire from an officer takes away the overwhelming majority of Leprechaun's health. A second shot from the cops takes Leprechaun to bleedout!
We're in danger! Rikter takes a 90 degree turn at break-neck pace to see about loosing them.
Leprechaun's turn... does he die here? Not quite yet. He stabilizes but becomes unconscious.
Armataige nails the windshield... more bulletproof glass.
The cops make the fast-turn too... and pepper us with more bullets.
Lucks on our side! A car carrier is conveniently parked in front of an overpass... let's see if the cops have the metal to follow us.
Rikter's turn and ramping off the car-carrier we make it to the overpass!
Boom! The not-flaming cruiser tried to make the jump and fails.
Leprechaun wakes up on the route to what we're doing with the van and we let the Bozos know the joke's still on.
As we roll up to the second objective a squad of Bozos climb out of their clown-car and begin dressing up the van for the auction... turning it into a coulrophobes nightmare.
After not too long 6th Street show up...
Rikter does his best to play the roll of the auctioneer asking them to wait for the auction to begin and asking them not to set off our Bozo security force.
Then the Tiger Claws show up... immediate tension as the two factions are on shooting terms.
Then the Bozos reinforcements show up keeping things orderly... which is utterly disturbing for a band of killer clowns.
"I see all prospective buyers are here, let's start the bidding at five thousand eddies!" - Rikter announces
A bidding war starts the moment he states a price inflating to unreasonable numbers
Rikter plays auctioneer stoking the bidding war until one side makes a bit that is answered with a gunshot...
There's not a moments hesitation before it's a full-on gunfight in front of the van.
All while the cops are coming in hot!
We take the hint it's time to leave and drop into the sewer and book it down the pipe leaving the detonator with the Bozos to use at the funniest possible moment.
Rikter leads the way through the sewer toward the combat zone... we only make it two miles before the whole sewer rocks from quite the boom.
The Fixer calls us once it hits the news and Rikter fills him in on what happened... he just hangs up and we get the payment on wire.
We peek up... Red Chrome Legion v Maelstrom battle on this street.
We decide to go a few more blocks but before we go Leprechaun yeets the mahole cover at the Red Chrome officer.
If anyone was thinking of investigating a single 'honk' from a horn bummed from a Bozo dissuades that notion.
We're then on our way... we find a block with a normal amount of violence going on and exit the sewers to sneak out of the combat zone.
Session called because that's enough chaos for one night.