this post was submitted on 21 Jul 2023
11 points (92.3% liked)

Jokes

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Lemmy users' attempts at being funny

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Less of a meme, more of a metameme. Lets hear your funniest pickup lines, muttered or received.

(Sorry mods if this should be on asklemmy. But I did it here, so /shrug (don't tell her though, because I like you more!)

I'll start (god this could be disastrous!)

  • HI, I'm MS Windows. Can I crash at your place tonight?
  • Do you know how much a Polar Bear weighs? Just enough to break the ice. Hi I'm ...
  • Hi, I'm Australian. I bet I meet all your prerequisite koalafications.

ok, lets hear some great hitters that are not all over the internet!

My personal favourite:

  • Hi, do you mind if I hang out here, until is safe back where I farted?
top 9 comments
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

My favorite is from Zapp Brannigan himself

"If I said you had a beautiful body would you take your pants off and dance around a little?"

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

That shirt is very becoming on you. If I was on you, I'd be coming too.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You mean Cheesy pickup lines?

This one from the 1980s springs to mind:

-"If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold that against me?"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

This is a classic, and I believe its still etched on Pompeii walls to this day!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I have 206 bones in my body, wanna add another?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Was it hard to get into these pants?

Is it gonna be hard for me?

[–] ogwillikers 2 points 1 year ago

Damn girl, do you shit with that ass?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

This shirt would look a lot better tossed in a corner of your bedroom.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I just shat my pants. Can I get in yours?