When I was an active in a band, "You should play our _________ (usually a very busy bar or restaurant), we can't pay you, but it'll be great exposure."
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When I was an active in a band, "You should play our _________ (usually a very busy bar or restaurant), we can't pay you, but it'll be great exposure."
I'm a linguistics enthusiast, which means people expect me to either know a lot of languages (which is, honestly, partly true) or be a grammar nazi (which is emphatically untrue).
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I cook burgers. A lot. I cook them at parties, graduations, weddings, etc. Won a contest to be on a cooking show; I'm not saying I'm the best, but I know my stuff.
When people assume you're meant to put ketchup on a burger I want to rip my tongue out.
What sauces do you put on it?
For the most history-accurate hamburger, mustard is the only condiment, with onions and pickle being wonderful complements. Ketchup was used to entice kids into eating hamburgers.
No ketchup on hot dogs either, especially not in front of a new Yorker.
Putting ketchup on my burgers and hotdogs will taste even better knowing somebody on the other side of the world is upset by it.
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I'm a nurse in cardiac critical care. I don't know why your kid has that rash.
For a while, I was a burlesque dancer as a fun little side gig. In my daytime life, I'm an accountant.
One day I was talking to someone on a non-work related Slack. I told them I'm an accountant and they asked me where they could find my OnlyFans page. That's the day I learned a lot of SWs tell people that they are accountants. This misconception happens all the time now. I've started saying "I'm an accountant. That's not code for anything. I really am just a regular accountant."
SWs wouldn't need to do this if we treated them better. I get why the community chose accountant as a faux title. It has made me talking about my work very awkward and creepy.
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Working IT: The entire family thinks I'll always be happy and eager to fix all of their computer problems for them.
Being an electrical engineer: People think I'm an electrician.
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I'm an English professor, and I get a lot of "Oh, I'll have to make sure to use good grammar around you." First, I have better manners than to go around correcting other people.* Second, I know enough about the development of the language to realize how fluid and often artificial the "rules" are.
- Unless you're trying to mansplain something to me. Then all bets are off.
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I'm an amateur stand-up comedian, so people ask me to tell my jokes all the time.
These people ignore the fact that a comedy set is all about the context in which you tell the joke
Unless, of course, you are Mitch Hedberg.