The Onion

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The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

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9/11 Truther Questions Why There Were Two Huge Bullseyes Painted On Side Of Twin Towers (youtu.be)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

1 comments fedilink

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Cop Worried Illegal Immigrants Eating Neighborhood Dogs He Planned on Shooting (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

17 comments fedilink

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The Onion Front Page: September 10, 2024 (theonion.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

24 comments fedilink

https://theonion.com/todays-historic-front-page-september-10-2024/

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Trump Avoids Answering Hard Questions By Pretending He Shot In Ear Again (theonion.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

2 comments fedilink

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Kamala Harris Tells Donald Trump he Should Smile More (www.seahorseshoe.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

0 comments fedilink

“He should smile more” said a beaming Kamala Harris. “He travels by private jet, won the Donald Trump golf trophy this year, and was the guest of honor in his January 6th fundraising gala. Yet all we see him do is scowl. You get more flies with honey than vinegar.”

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Air Force One Makes Emergency Landing at Dairy Queen (www.duffelblog.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by SomeAmateur to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink

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Cybertruck Owner Brags About High-Tech Pedal That Makes Vehicle Accelerate When Pressed (theonion.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

10 comments fedilink

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Apple’s Tim Cook to unveil reasons why your current iPhone is already a piece of shit (newsthump.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

45 comments fedilink

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'Trans People's Issues Alienate the Working Class,' Says Democrat Who's Never Met Either (reductress.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

117 comments fedilink

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Trump Campaign Powerless Against Group of Teenage Girls Saying "Ew" (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

35 comments fedilink

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Ezra Levant furious to discover he could have been getting money from Russia this whole time (www.thebeaverton.com)

submitted 4 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

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Horrified Taylor Swift Realizes Football Happens Every Year (theonion.com)

submitted 4 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

11 comments fedilink

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Switchblade-Wielding Subway Rider Locked In Standoff With Penis-Wielding Subway Rider (theonion.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink

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‘Woke media is harming our children psychologically’, insists man who is perfectly fine with them doing active shooter drills at elementary school (newsthump.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

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‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens (theonion.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

121 comments fedilink

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Opinion: Millennials Would Be Able to Afford Homes If They Didn’t Let Older Kids Trick Them Into Giving Up Their Most Valuable Pokémon Cards (hard-drive.net)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

24 comments fedilink

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Elon Musk Threatens ISS Crash Over X Ban (isglitch.com)

submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

10 comments fedilink

SpaceX CEO claims it's "just a prank" in escalating Brazil dispute

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Opinion: The Fact That the Muppets Only Took Manhattan Means They’ll Never Be “Real” New Yorkers (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

6 comments fedilink

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Slippery Slope: Funk Singer Asking You to Give It to Him One Time Probably Going to Ask You to Give It to Him Two Times (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

25 comments fedilink

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Donald Trump Promises To Bring Fruitopia Vending Machines Back to Public Schools if Elected in Latest Unhinged Rant (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

34 comments fedilink

Until this moment I completely forgot about those things

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Sources Allege Tim Walz’s ‘Aw, Shucks’ Persona Merely Facade Concealing True ‘Gee Whiz’ Tendencies (theonion.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

13 comments fedilink

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Cat Scientists Theorize About Third Type Of Food That Neither Wet Nor Dry (theonion.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

13 comments fedilink

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'Boneless' pizza can have bones, US court rules (lemmy.ca)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

16 comments fedilink

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Lucky Astronauts Still Stranded in Space During Election Year (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

5 comments fedilink

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Francis Scott Key Estate Sends Cease-And-Desist To Trump For Playing ‘Star-Spangled Banner’ At Rally (theonion.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

13 comments fedilink