this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2023
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Transfem

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With some migrations underway it's natural to use well established community names for discoverability, but it got me thinking how I've always disliked MtF as a community name since it feels dated and "medicalizing".

Not trying to start anything here, just wondering out loud if a "Transfem" community would cater to the same needs but with less emphasis on where you supposedly came from and more focused on what we want.

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[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, I think "Transfem" would be a more accurate and just overall better name. I agree it's better to focus on where we are rather than where we were. I never liked MtF because in my view I was never "male". Transfem just describes what I am and always have been.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Ahh that perspective makes so much more sense to me. MtF just describes a medical process when i think of it. Hopefully transfem catches on!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

I like "transfem" for two main reasons: 1) the old acronym can be an unhappy reminder of "M" times 2) it's much more inclusive of transfem enbies.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I named it mtf after the mtf subreddit. We even stole their icon lol 😅 I can change the name to transfem, or MtF - Transfem or something like that. The !mtf I cant change but the actual title is easily changeable.

If you check the sidebar too I do specify that the community is for all transfeminine people and experiences. But yeah the name could be changed.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Totally get that, many practical reasons! I'd vote for including it in the name as well. I did check the sidebar but managed to miss that.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

the reason why the reddit sub is called that is because it was created years ago, when mtf was the generally accepted terminology. i agree with naming this one something else

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

True, it does. Transfem sounds much nicer name. I had heard people complain that they have to always think what M and F refer to and which direction is should go.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Having googled some definitions, transfem is one of those terms that doesn't have one clear definition whereas MtF has enough history to be fairly unambiguous. No matter what it would draw a slightly different venn diagram as a name. That isn't a bad thing, just not sure what it looks like from an NB angle.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

I consider myself NB transfem. I prefer transfem because, to me at least, it invokes a feeling of movement towards feminity as opposed to into feminity.

For a community name I'm honestly not sure which one would be better. I think discoverability and inclusivity should be the deciding factors. MtF has the lineage from past communities and transfem is more inclusive.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

"MTF" feels sometimes like a backhanded way of still calling me a guy. I'm not a guy. It also reinforces the gender binary, which I feel we have a pretty significant population that doesn't fall neatly into that or feel comfortable self-describing as that.

I think it also might benefit to mention that while yes, this is a community about transfems, all queer or even cis people are welcome to engage so long as they're respectful. Possibly in the sidebar.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I prefer the term "MtF" myself. It was really helpful when I was questioning, and made it easier to engage with the community from the outside. I still like it now since it represents transition, and it can still be useful when searching for transition related information online.

The term "transfemme" also feels a bit exclusionary of trans women on the more butch side of presentation. All trans women are female, but not all of us are feminine. Though I do understand "transfemme" is more inclusionary of non-binary identities, so I don't think there's a good way to be 100% inclusive of all of us.

Keeping the Reddit name of MtF would also make it easier for people to make the move to Lemmy in the future too. It certainly was a factor in me attempting the move here as well.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The term "transfemme" also feels a bit exclusionary of trans women on the more butch side of presentation. All trans women are female, but not all of us are feminine. Though I do understand "transfemme" is more inclusionary of non-binary identities, so I don't think there's a good way to be 100% inclusive of all of us.

OP suggested transfem, not transfemme. I think the former is more inclusive than the latter as "fem" can be short for both "female" and "feminine". But that's my personal take on it, and no clue if other people see it that way or use it that way.

Personally, I liked MtF when I was clueless to trans terminology because even if you don't think trans people are their actual gender, its unambiguous what it means. Meanwhile, someone who doesn't see trans women as women or trans men as men can easily be confused about whether a trans woman is someone who was AFAB and trans or a woman who happens to be trans. Hence all the accidental ally memes of transphobes telling trans women they'll never be real men or trans men they'll never be real women. But I think the concerns of the people actually part of the community should matter more than worrying about how ignorant people will display their ignorance in funny ways.

Anyways, I consider myself transfem (even if I don't really like using the label), but not mtf. Given the sub description specifies its not just for mtfs, I don't really care either way.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I generally prefer transfem to the acronym, when I read the acronym it feels like it indicates a more academic/medical discourse which is fine sometimes but yeah maybe as a community name it's a little weird.