this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2023
190 points (91.3% liked)

Programmer Humor

19623 readers
4 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Every line of code has been audited by all security researchers. The implementation is language agnostic and extremely slim (0 LOC). It runs all the JavaScript I want (none).

all 29 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (2 children)

No bugs, no security issues. It's the perfect runtime.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And yet, somehow there is still a bug in the datetime implementation.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Then we can just catch the error and pretend it never happened

[–] newIdentity 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Ironically, such a site would more bugs then of it would use Javascript. And security issues are still an issue too.

Basically everything has to be handled through forms and a site reload and hidden components and lots of css :hover events. Have you ever tried making a dropout without Javascript? It isn't impossible, but really hard.

And such sites exist. Just that they're mostly Darknet sites like like Dread or Bohemia

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

dropout menus are actually pretty easy to do without js

all you need is focus-within and friends.

like i recently made one on my personal project (which fully works without js, which is only used for realtime chat functionality and some additional effects, like loading icons in forms and stuff)

live deployment: https://fortum.pp.ua/
recording: https://streamable.com/4ba0gg

[–] newIdentity 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's pretty impressive. I tried doing something similar a few months ago but couldn't find anything. Are you using a framework or how do you render the site on the server?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

about the menu - it's just based on focus-within. no need for any terrible hacks.
about the backend - it's just some basic templates (tera+rocket)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Pretty cool. Btw on your 404 page, the footer is in the center of my screen (vertical center). I am on android using Firefox. I hit the 404 error trying out the search bar. Just thought you might like to know.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

yeah it's unfinished, I'm planning to get back to it soon

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

It's not at all compatible with my katamari ball of totally required libraries and dependencies - 0/10

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I really like it and it clearly passed the code review without any issues. But I find the diagnostic messages a bit lacking, it can be hard to debug.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But I find the diagnostic messages a bit lacking

That's weird. Every line of business logic has an infinite amount of logging. Ticket closed; works for me.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Oh, but at the same time every single line of business logic logs nothing of value at all!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Well, it's best practice to only log errors. So .....

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

No need to de-bug if there is no bugs *taps head*

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But you can’t compress or obfuscate it, that’s a downside.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The runtime doesn't need to be obfuscated. Only the code you run with it. You can still compress and obfuscate that and it will run just as well as it did before. Actually you can completely scramble your code and it would still run exactly the same.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Sweet! That means I can encrypt my code to keep prying eyes away.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago
[–] cloudy1999 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One cool thing is that the comments are self documenting. I read the program earlier and it's quite clear what it does. Excellent accomplishment, dear colleague!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Sweet! Now I don't have to recursively write comments to explain the meaning of each comment

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Can you share the github link? I'm really eager to use it in one of my key projects where JS is a core component :D

[–] ASK_ME_ABOUT_LOOM 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

This project is so popular that it's preinstalled on every OS!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Ah, is it the famous rm -rf / command?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

GNOME-based distros use JS for extensions.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Perfection!

[–] darcy 3 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Honestly, many of my colleagues need to use this instead of the balls of mud they manage to create.