Oh boy, I can't wait to not be able to afford my medication for my autoimmune disease and die by vomiting blood until I exsanguinate! Thanks abstainers!
this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2024
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Make sure to aim at a Republican when you vom.
It's pretty gruesome. Black and thick, like charcoal dust. I hope whatever fascist I die on is scarred for life.
Damn, I just get internal scarring and organ failure. The blood cannon sounds way cooler.
The obviousness of it literally saved my life. Last time it happened I was still in college and living at home. Threw up in the bathroom, and weakly staggered to my room, thinking it was dark because I'd drank a cola just before. I was ready to lay there and fall asleep until I felt better.
My mother, luckily, was home, noticed that there was half-washed out black slurry in the toilet and sink, recognized it as blood, unlike me at the time, and worriedly asked me if everything was alright. I said, "Yeah, mom, I'm fine, just a little nauseous." and she said fuck no, that's not cutting it, we're taking you to the hospital.
I had to get blood transfusions. They weren't sure I was going to make it. If I'd passed out on the floor of my room like I intended to wait it out, I'd've probably died. Gave my poor mother a terrible fright.
That is hard fuckin core
Isn't it? I'm glad I got a disease with cool symptoms and not just pooping myself to death, dysentery style. This way I at least have a cool story I can tell XD
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Better scream something at them right before:
"Hail Satan"
"My woke mind virus must spread"
"I bathe thee in communist red"
Y'know something along those lines
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Have you tried not having a pre-existing condition?
They’ll say this is a feature not a bug.
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Oz has been a major supporter of Medicare Advantage, the program’s private sector alternative that has grown in popularity but has come under intense scrutiny for care denials and alleged overbilling.
In case you didn't RTFA: This is the grift
Trump's motto: Always Be Grifting
Make America Grift Always
Trump and his cronies want to privatize the world. That’s the end goal. Gut all government agencies and sell them off to Elon or some private equity firm. If you want to live in the future they’re building it’s gonna be pay to play. You want healthcare, pay for it. You want education, pay for it. You want oxygen, pay for it!
….and 76 million people voted for it. 76 million people have fucked over 260 million people all cause they drank the orange kool-aid.
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Haha, oh wow. You guys over there really are fucked.
We did it... We taught those Democrats a lesson... Yay...
Don’t worry, a majority of voters will think the impending enshittification is all the Democrats fault by the time the next (if any) election comes along.
There was a lesson, but it hasn't been taught yet. This is just the trailer of the film, coming in January. Title: "Oh no."
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I hate this country so much.
Oh my fucking God I cannot take this fucking clown show anymore.
What in the fuck! One of biggest medical grifters in medicine is going to be in charge of billions of dollars of federal money? I really hope we lose everything this is Idiocracy 2.0.
At least in Idiocracy the President selected the smartest person to do the work.
You're surprised? I wouldn't have been surprised if Dr Phil was his pick.
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Thanks, Oprah.
Yep.
Dr Phil Dr Oz Jenny McCarthy
She sure knows how to pick 'em.
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Make America a joke again
Trump knows he lost in 2020, and he hates America for it. That's why we're getting TV show people and child rapists.
Trump wants like minded people in his team!
Trump wants to cause as much damage as possible because he's a traitor
You know.... Come on, Russia. Send those bombs and let's wrap this up.
Why would they bomb their own country?
Is he just picking people he sees on TV?
I read the explanation that Trump doesn't read but watches the telly and he is not building a cabinet but a cast. Bigger, louder and more exposure is better. Then it sort of makes sense.
How big of a fit do you think he threw when he was told he couldn't nominate Hannibal Lecter for anything because you can't be fictional and run a government department?
Well, I mean Trump is a former reality TV star so birds of a feather and all.
Oh good, a guy who uses the word "magic" too many times for medicine is gonna do great...
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Why not get Dr.fucking Phil to be head of all mental facilities and everything mental. So he can push more people to suicide because he has nothing worthwhile to add or say to help people. Just go fucking full circle.
Ol' Phil may have a tiny vestigial conscience, and I do mean tiny, but it still may be disqualifying for this administration.
I like The Onion as much as the next guy but I don't think it's appropriate here
Holy fuck.
Was Jerry Springer already booked?
He's quite dead, so he would likely cause less harm than Oz will.
Springer was a lawyer and mayor, at least he'd bring some qualifications.
I hate that I'm wondering if I'm eating the onion every time one of these clowns is announced.
Ha ha ha. Yet another con man on the team!
If y'all are going back to the Victorian era, why not bring back poisoning?
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