this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2024
767 points (99.0% liked)

Microblog Memes

5837 readers
1454 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 42 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 74 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

A friend of mine went to Vegas once and we only got 2 texts from him in the group chat the entire time.

Day 1: I'm up!

Day 5: I'm down.

[–] jballs 27 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The flight from Denver to Las Vegas is just over an hour. I was meeting some friends in Vegas for a bachelor party and texted them saying I was taking off. The conversation went like this:

Me: Flight is taking off now, will text you when I get in.

Friend: Just sat down at the blackjack table at Treasure Island. See you in a bit.

Time skip ahead to me landing.

Me: Just landed. You still at Treasure Island?

Friend: I'm down 4 grand. Went back to the hotel.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Here's the list of things I like about Vegas:

  1. Getting on the plane to leave
[–] [email protected] 68 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I’ve been to a casino exactly one time in my life, and it was earlier this year. Went for the cheap hotel.

I did not spend any money at the casino, but I did get $15 free for being a certain demographic of new customer. I played that, won $158, cashed out and won’t ever do it again (unless I get more free money, anyway).

I’m sure what they wanted by giving me a win on the last $2 (it’s all controlled by cards, they know what my demographic is, and that people in it are likely to be depressed and on the poor side, and thus potential gambling addicts) was for me to keep playing to try to score more, but what it really did was point out dark patterns and make me wildly uncomfortable with the whole situation..

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

What's your demographic? Middle-aged white guy?

[–] [email protected] 30 points 2 weeks ago

lol no, silly, they don’t give you free money for that. That’s just the demographic they compare everything to as a baseline :)

It obviously depends on the establishment in question, but you get free shit for being a veteran, teacher, healthcare worker, firefighter or other emergency worker, stuff like that. Or a senior probably, they get tons of free shit, too.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

They usually make it so you can't cash out anything that's less than the voucher. Or rather that the wins get counted first.

Let's say you get $50 free, win $25. You then play for $25 and lose, the remaining $25 shown on your balance won't be able to be cashed out.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

What did you play to win $158?

Asking for a friend

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Why gamble IRL when you could instead gamble with stocks online and lose your life savings /s

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Because stocks take time, casinos are almost instant.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

That's the problem with this generation, no capacity to appreciate delayed dissatisfaction!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Psst

Wanna buy some 0dte options

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Just drop it in a spider and reap the 5% growth per year caused by new immigrants... er, wait.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’d love to be able to lose three grand in a casino.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

They usually have super predatory lines of credit you can sign up for, you know, in case you're out of money and would still like to enjoy losing that much.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah exactly. Not having 3 grand is no obstacle for them to get you to lose 3 grand!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago

Well, at least he was honest to himself and the world. Plenty of people who will not even stop at losing 3 grand, let alone own up and quit.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I mean, I have a foolproof way to always come out on top at a casino, it's a simple trick that gamblers will hate you for.

  1. Dress smart, it makes you look like an easy mark.
  2. Make sure to wear black shoes, polished to a shine, this will be important later.
  3. Own the casino.
  4. Ignore 1 and 2.
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

I have heard of someone who did just this but still went bankrupt multiple times.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Oceans eleven got this right:

https://y.yarn.co/4a06fe4f-7d9a-4809-a330-8b31a3ef1e7e_text.gif

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago

Except if Trump is the owner. That fool can bankrupt inanimate objects.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

Seems like a terrible place to make bread...I mean is there even an oven?

I first I thought others a grow operation because of all the purple lighting.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought it wouldn’t be hard for him. Maybe his brother Chris might have more luck.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Chris Peacock? Is that what a guy gets when he stands too close to the camp fire?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

A fool and his money are soon parted.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I've lived near casinos my entire life, and I can't understand the appeal of the gambling part. Unless it's the shiny lights. I like those. Those are nice.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

People have an inherent inability to assess probability. Even with "safer" games like black jack when your odds are a little closer to 50:50, people will keep pushing until they have no money left. Bet it all 4 times and there's about a 94% chance you lose it all.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

When I turned 21 my dad (very rational guy) was helping me learn video blackjack, it was stuff like determining probability, risk reward, strategy (getting dealer to guarantee bust allowing us to play safely), just blackjack stuff

Some advice that will now stick with me if I ever go gambling again is, due to probability, losing any money you won and then some, is a matter of when. House will always win if you’re in it for the long game, so either quit while you ahead, quit once you’ve won $X, or quit once you’ve lost $Y. Always assume the third option will happen even if you’re playing smart

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That's the smart plan. Every time I've been to a casino (4 times I can recall) I had an amount set aside that I was prepared to lose and that would be it for me. A couple times I got ahead and just cashed out.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Your comment reminded me of another thing he said regarding that matter

Think of the money your putting in as what your willing to pay for to have fun

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Oh yeah 100%

There’s a reason the guy who whips out the terms of service to get a better deal is in charge of our families finances

[–] AllHailTheSheep 4 points 2 weeks ago

that's how they get ya

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

The lights are fun when you're drunk.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

If he says it was 3, it was 5

[–] knobbysideup 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

I just go to the strip clubs. At least I get some proper entertainment for the lost money then. Actually I do hang out at the quarter slots. You get free beer.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Went last night to stay at a hotel with a casino to celebrate my wife's birthday. I play poker a lot with friends but only a few times at casinos, and my wife only does slot machines. We never go to casinos and this is the first time in like a decade. Got away from the kids for the first time in 7 years so after she quickly lost $80 like it was nothing to slots we were already good.

After talking, she finally agreed to a long-time promise about going to the strip club together since she's never been to anything like that. I have to agree with you, I may have lost the rest of my money, but it was a dam great time and an amazing first-time experience and something I hope I never forget (for both of us since it was way different than just going solo)!

That's something that never would have happened staying at the depressing slots, which may have been 30 more minutes tops to lose what I spent there. 1 bucket list item checked, lol.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

not really free if you keep feeding the machine

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

What did he draw??

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

The best way to win into casino is this.

Go to a casino.

Get given free drinks, drink the free drinks.

Leave. Having had some nice free drinks.