this post was submitted on 23 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

In that scenario, the spouse doing the parenting who isn't a narcissist should divorce the narcissist. Or keep their pants on until the divorce happens.

'somehow that leads to cheating' No it does not 'somehow' lead to anything.

Either the person is in control of their actions, in which case they should have the self-control to postpone sex at least until divorce process begins, or they are not in control of their actions and are helpless to prevent themselves from sleeping with the other person, in which case they are not the paragon of virtue you paint them to be. They may well be a better parent than the narcissist, which is why I don't say custody should be automatic. I am only saying that infidelity should be strongly considered in custody decisions.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I find your lack of empathy for abuse victims quite concerning TBH.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I have a ton of empathy for abuse victims.
Having something shitty done to you, doesn't mean it's okay for you to be shitty.
Cheating is not okay, even if your spouse is abusive. Leaving an abusive spouse is a valid reaction. Cheating is not.

And from a legal perspective, the second we open up the can of worms of 'This person is shitty there for it's okay to be shitty to them' you create a slippery slope that could easily be used by shitty people against good people.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I have a ton of empathy for abuse victims.

It’s pretty obvious that you don’t.

Having something shitty done to you, doesn't mean it's okay for you to be shitty.

I did not say that.

This person is shitty there for it's okay to be shitty to them'

I did not say that.

you create a slippery slope that could easily be used by shitty people against good people.

So, according to you malignant narcissists are good people? Okay

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I did not say that

But you did. Not in so many words, but you said it.

I made the simple point that cheating is not okay, that there should be consequences for cheating. You brought up abuse victims. I said abuse victims should leave their abuser rather than cheating on them. And you said I have no sympathy for them.
The logical conclusion from your statement, is that you think abuse victims cheating on their abuser is okay. And that me saying they should leave their abuser rather than cheating on them is without empathy.

If I'm understanding the situation wrong, can you clarify your position a little? Are you or are you not trying to say that it is somehow okay for abuse victims to cheat on their abuser? And if you think that is okay, why?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

But you did. Not in so many words, but you said it.

Where?